this laws contains....
Arnold’s Laws of Documentation
Arnold
1. If it should exist it doesn’t.
2. If it does exist it’s out of date.
3. Only useless documentation transcends the first two laws.
2. If it does exist it’s out of date.
3. Only useless documentation transcends the first two laws.
Austen’s Second Law
Jane Austen
If there is anything disagreeable going on, men are sure to get out of it.
Baker’s Law of Inanimation
Russell Baker
Inanimate objects are scientifically classified into three major categories - those that don’t work those that break down and those that get lost.
Beer’s Law
Stafford Beer
Absolutum obsoletum - if it works, it’s out of date
Cheops’s Law
Anon
No project was ever completed on time and within budget.
Conran’s Law of Cooking
Shirley Conran
Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.
Conran’s Law of Housework
Shirley Conran
It [housework] expands to fill the time available plus half an hour: so obviously it is never finished.
Drazen’s Law of Restitution
Louis D. Rubin
The time it takes to rectify a situation is inversely proportional to the time it took to do the damage.
Emerson’s Second Law
Ralph Waldo Emerson
If a man write a better book preach a better sermon or make a better mousetrap than his neighbor tho’ he build his house in the woods the world will make a beaten path to his door.
Galbraith’s First Law
John Kenneth Galbraith
Herblock’s Law
Herbert 'Herblock' Block
If it’s good, they’ll stop making it.
Hobson’s Choice
Thomas Hobson
No real choice - that is Hobson’s choice or none.
Kahn’s Law
Alfred Kahn
If you can’t explain what you’re doing in simple English, you are probably doing something wrong.
Lance’s Law
Bert Lance
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
Lardner’s Law
Ring Lardner
Two can live cheaper than one.
Laver’s Law of Fashion
James Laver
The same costume will be:
- Indecent: 10 years before its time
- Shameless: 5 years before its time
- Outré (daring): 1 year before its time
- Smart- Dowdy: 1 year after its time
- Hideous: 10 years after its time
- Ridiculous: 20 years after its time
- Amusing: 30 years after its time
- Quaint: 50 years after its time
- Charming: 70 years after its time
- Romantic: 100 years after its time
- Beautiful: 150 years after its time
- Shameless: 5 years before its time
- Outré (daring): 1 year before its time
- Smart- Dowdy: 1 year after its time
- Hideous: 10 years after its time
- Ridiculous: 20 years after its time
- Amusing: 30 years after its time
- Quaint: 50 years after its time
- Charming: 70 years after its time
- Romantic: 100 years after its time
- Beautiful: 150 years after its time
Leopold’s Second Law
Aldo Leopold
The first requisite of intelligent tinkering is to save all the pieces.
Lowery’s Law
William P. Lowery
Just when you get really good at something you don’t need it anymore.
Mencken’s First Law
H. L. Mencken
No man ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.
Micawber’s Second Law
Charles Dickens
Accidents will occur in the best regulated families.
Midas’s Law
John Updike
Possession diminishes perception of value immediately.
Murphy’s Fourth Law
Edward A. Murphy
If you play with anything long enough, it will break.
Murphy’s Law of Auto Repair
Edward A. Murphy
Any tool dropped while repairing an automobile will roll beneath the vehicle to its exact centre.
Payn’s Law
James Payn
If a piece of buttered toast falls, it will land face down.
Rawson’s Second Law
Hugh Rawson
Never throw away anything unless you know what it came from.
Rosenfield’s Regret
Anon
The most delicate component will be dropped.
Sandburg’s Law
Carl Sandburg
The customer is always right.
Sattinger’s Law
Anon
It works better if you plug it in.
Searle’s Sage Sample
Anon
The cussedness of inanimate objects is beyond understanding.
Shadwell’s Law
Thomas Shadwell
Every man loves what he is good at.
Shakespeare’s First Law
William Shakespeare
There’s small choice in rotten apples.
Veblen’s Law
Thorstein Veblen
Conspicuous consumption of valuable goods is a means of respectability to the gentleman of leisure.
Wesley’s Law
John Wesley
Cleanliness is next to godliness.
Zahner’s Law
Louis Zahner
If you play with anything long enough, it will break.
Anthony’s Law of Force
Anthony
Don’t force it get a larger hammer.
Archimedes’s Third Principle
Hugh Rawson
When a body is immersed in water, the telephone will ring.
Avery’s Observation
Anon
It does not matter if you fall down, as long as you pick up something from the floor while you get up.
Clyde’s Law
Clyde F. Adams
If you have something to do and you put it off for long enough, the chances are someone else will do it for you.
Eve’s Discovery
Anon
At a bargain sale, the only suit or dress that you like best and that fits you is the one not in the sale. Adam’s Corollary it’s easy to tell when you’ve got a bargain - it doesn’t fit.
Hodgson’s Law of Motoring Spin-Offs
Editor
Undertakers love overtakers.
Oliver’s Tool Rule
Oliver Jacques
Part 1: Only at the start/re-start of a DIY job do you realise the need to return to your toolbox/shed to retrieve another tool.
Part 2: Only after locking your toolbox/shed at the end of a DIY job do you find another tool to return to your toolbox/shed.
Part 3: Careful planning has no affect on either Part 1 or Part 2.
Pruett’s Law of Perversity
Jim Pruett
Things hate people.
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